Dear Charley

Feeling Crushed by the Crush

Jul 29, 2016

Dear Charley,
Even though you’re gone right now, what with the time travel and all, how do you handle the new romance between Beth and Lex? I've liked this guy in my class for a long time. He's so funny and nice but he told me the other day that he actually likes my best friend. I feel kind of dumb for not realizing he’s not really into me, and it's really hard to see the way he looks at her. She doesn't know, but I'm afraid she'll start dating him when she finds out, and it'll ruin everything between me and her! How do you get through something like this?

Hopeless Romantic

Dear Hopeless,
Man, I'm sorry that happened to you. That's a rough situation to be in but, trust me, it will be okay. First of all, don't beat yourself up! Take the "hopeless" out of your signature, because you're just going through one of the many bumps that teenagers go through when they're looking for love—it's not hopeless!

I haven't talked to Beth much about Lex—you know, what with my current situation and all—but I'm sure she probably feels pretty embarrassed that Lex doesn't like her the way she likes him—no fault of hers!

Meantime, you're not sure if your friend even likes your crush back, and I'm sure she loves you and would not want to hurt you. You have to talk it over with her and decide what to do. Even if you have a worst case scenario—meaning she does like him back and wants to date him—you wouldn't want to lose a good friend over this.

What happens if you try being happy for both of them? If she's really your bestie, she would want the same thing for you. Really, that generosity of spirit would be a sign that she is a true friend: 4 Signs of a True Friend.

My point is it hurts right now but the hurt will go away in time even if it doesn't feel like it will ever stop. (Trust me: I know something about the way time really works!) Sometimes we think there are people meant for us but they actually aren't, and that's part of the experience.

That just means someone—or something—better for you is comin' your way.

Your Partner in Time Travel,